Why A Mistress? Reading Between The Lines

“Mistress: something between a mister and a mattress”–Author Unknown

But if you look at what we have today, a mistress is everywhere from 20/20 to the local newspaper, especially if she’s bedded someone famous.  She has lots to say and she is scorned, angry, and confused.  Men, beware of the mistress of today.

What happened to the good ole days when the mistress was thanked; when the mistress was the reason the marriage stayed together.  It allowed the husband to find an outlet for his needs who wasn’t quite ready it to throw the baby out with the bath water.  He wants to stay home.  The right mistress can do just that.  She stays in her lane, never one to be demanding or threatening to expose her lover.  She is well taken care of for her cooperation.  She knows that the relationship can end at any moment, at any time, without further notice.  Kinda like cable.  Back in the days, the mistress was the one who took care of the husband’s sexual needs, while the wife attended to it whenever she got around to it. Many wives didn’t mind because they were too tired, anyway.  But the major reason they didn’t mind because she knew that her husband loved her, and what he was doing was nothing personal.  It was what they called, “Being loyal, but not faithful.” 

Of course, to women nowadays this won’t fly.  Mostly because men are way too sloppy about this, and women too accusatory making men feel they might as well cheat if she expects it.  There are too many mistresses because of women.  Back in the days, Uncle Tommy knew that his wife was his wife, and he sipped some tea on the weekends it was because, well, “what the eye don’t see don’t hurt the heart”.  In some cases, Uncle Tommy gets the mistress pregnant, and the wife takes over, bringing the child into the family.  It’s odd, I know, but it happened.  The mistress was usually “sent away.”  Then the house goes back to normal.  The wives always maintained the superior role, avoiding succumbing to tears and threats.  When she was ready to strike though, she’d come through hard.  Seen that scene when the woman looking for her husband busted through the bar window with her bare hands in Lackawanna Blues?  Alright, then. 

You may be wondering why I am not mentioning cute little boyfriends and girlfriends.  Frankly, if you’re not married, the big __________ just isn’t worth the stress.  Really, it ain’t.  Might as well get the house, than another underwhelming “Sorry.”

In many cultures, besides ours, unfortunately, women have to be mistresses.  In fact, in some European and African countries it is the only way to supplement your college education or finances because the job markets are very tight.  These men would usually financially support the woman and her family for a little tea on the weekends.  The wives may know about these arrangements because many of them have done it themselves.  Call it what you may, but it is not seen as a bad thing in other cultures, but as a help meet.  Take a look at the polygamy story in the Related Posts below. 

Most women do not get the difference between being loyal or faithful and that’s ok.  We all want everyone to be faithful and kind to one another but the world doesn’t always walk in a straight line.  And the truth is, many people are caught up in a mess of some sorts.  Before you misinterpret, I am not condoning mistresses at all.  Though, in the immortal words of our famous Chris Rock who once said, “….But I understand”.

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