Comments on: White Men Are Not The Only Option

By: Frantzzz

Frantzzz — Wed, 14 Apr 2010 18:28:29 +0000

Black women are too damn picky when it comes to black guys. They judge black guys like shit, so therefore black guys wave them goodbye. It’s that simple.

By: adamant

adamant — Fri, 16 Oct 2009 19:52:58 +0000

All these single black women, all these missed opportunities to explore lesbianism!

By: daphne

daphne — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 04:01:32 +0000

Apologies – my last paragraph should have read:

As for me, I’m not blind: “white” men make up the majority of men in the United States, and that’s a lot men to be ruling out, if one is serious about marriage. I’m not ruling out any other ethnicity, either, but statistically speaking, Asian men aren’t exactly in abundance – they’re concentrated in certain pockets of the US, primarily in the West and Northwest. I’ve no doubt there are good black men, and a fair share of them. That said, I’ve no intention of scrapping with other women for the minority that are good black men, not when there are men of varying ethnicity or race who are available. But hey, if one is content being single, I suppose it doesn’t matter.

By: daphne

daphne — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 03:43:07 +0000

Word to Aisha. Women have a right to date and marry who they choose; however, no one discusses potential cultural conflicts with dating non-American men. That includes non-American black men. Hell, certain cultures within the US and/or North America may conflict with my values, so why would I go to another country, actively seeking someone? If it naturally happens, that’s one thing. But assuming someone who is brown like me is automatically more compatible than someone who isn’t makes no sense to me.

To be clear-eyed: I enjoy freedoms and privileges as an American woman that many (most?) women of the world do not. To be blunt: I’m not giving that up, for myself or my children, just have some brown(er) babies. That’s my choice – not telling any other woman what to do.

As for me, I’m not blind: “white” men make up the majority of men in the United States, and that’s a lot men to be ruling out, if one is serious about marriage. I’m not ruling out any other ethnicity, either, but statistically speaking, Asian men aren’t exactly in abundance – they’re concentrated in certain pockets of the US, primarily in the West and Northwest. I’ve no doubt there are good black men, and a fair share of them. But hey, if one is content being single, I suppose it doesn’t matter.

By: missing_pieces

missing_pieces — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 03:11:11 +0000

Excuse me? But this post has got me confused. Why is dating outside of your race/culture still a huge deal to us? And it always comes down to the same situation, 45% of black women are single blah, blah, blah- they should start having interracial relationships yada, yada, yada. I personally feel like all the above the blogger posted is a self fulfilling prophecy. I think part of the issue is to not limit yourself and romantic options by being open to true commitment/love whatever form it comes in . That is the whole premise of the movie “Something New,” not the fact that Kenya (Sanaa Lathan) ends up with a white man.

I’m sorry but I’m just sick and tired of some black women whining about this same issue over and over again. No, a white man is not the only option but neither is any black man as a matter of fact if he isn’t right for you (also the point of “Something New). Men are men, no matter what color they are. I agree with THC, get out and lead a fabulous life by traveling the world- why limit yourself to one continent? It’s your love life!

I say this with love: If you don’t want a husband/family then wait all you want for the “Ideal Black Man,” but something tells me that lack of good/educated black men isn’t the real issue here because there is no damned shortage, we’ve just bought into the hype. There are great men of every color (esp. black men) waiting/ wanting a fabulous black woman. It’s your choice to believe it or not.

By: And Now for ‘Something New’??? « My Polar Opposite

And Now for ‘Something New’??? « My Polar Opposite — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 16:57:55 +0000

[...] And Now for ‘Something New’??? October 14, 2009 Leave a comment Go to comments An excerpt of this blog appeared yesterday on Alphanista.com. View it here: http://tinyurl.com/yg7r7lp [...]

By: T. Lynn Lloyd

T. Lynn Lloyd — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 16:51:47 +0000

Oronde, I’m really glad to hear it! I don’t really think that all the “good” Black men are with White women, just that statistically interracial relationships have been between Black men and White women – sistas are lagging behind on that trend: in the study I referenced, 24% of Black men had interracial marriages vs 4% of the Black women.

Sistas probably carry a lot of slavery baggage with us, remembering that female slaves were raped by the men who owned them, and we don’t want to feed into it somehow. I know that’s how I feel about it; my grandmother was Massa’s daughter so that slavery legacy is very close to home for my family. The “type” of Black man I want is one who is loving and committed, is emotionally available, and is secure enough in himself not to get all weird around the people I associate with.

Honestly, to some of the brothas I see with White women, I say she can have you – LOL!

By: oronde

oronde — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 16:12:52 +0000

i resent the comment that \”black men would rather marry white women.\” i\’m a black man, and 99% of my friends are black men and NONE of us are married to white women. and before you ask:
i have a great corporate job
making great money,
i went to a prominent hbcu,
i\’m not gay,
i\’m not a criminal,
AND i\’m good looking.
yes, i do realize that there are black men that dig white women, and i guess a lot of them are the \”type\” a woman like you is looking for, but then again, there are lots of us that do actually prefer sisters and put them at the top of the food chain. i\’ve never so much as dated a white women, the closest i\’ve come is latino women, which any born and bred new yorker will tell you, isn\’t even really considered an interracial relationship.

By: The Hooker Chronicles

The Hooker Chronicles — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 16:11:44 +0000

I always tell my sistas that if you want to find a good black man then venture out.

Black men are all over the world. From London to Paris!

We have to learn to step away from the comforts of our neighborhoods and travel more.

I guarantee you will find some of the greatest black men outside of the US!

Travel to Brighton UK, the black men there are FABULOUS! I’m thinking of moving there in 5 years!

By: Aisha

Aisha — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 12:28:57 +0000

As the product of a marriage from a black woman and a Pakistani man (still married after 25 years) I say go for it, but if you think its going to be easier then dating a white man then you’re mistaken. White culture whilst it is different from ours is still very mainstream, accessible and vanilla when compared to dating people who are from other countries especially those with long roots, rich cultures, and different religions. This could even apply to dating a black African man.Maybe exploring the realm of Asian-American men might be a good look as suggested by an earlier response as Asian men are the male equivalent of black women in the dating world.