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The Alpha-Female–More Than A Woman

October 20, 2008

WH Social Secretary Desiree Rogers

WH Social Secretary Desiree Rogers

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Unlike the Alpha-Male who has extensive studies on his conduct and behavior, the research on this peculiar type of woman is still limited.

I know it well, because I wear it well. Always tried to subdue it, but I’ve surrended. So, I made a list. An AF is a quintessential woman. She’s me. All of the major female characters in my novels are an embodiment of the AF. There is none like her, just like her counterpart the Alpha Male. Though they are many Alpha males and men who want to be like him, there are few genuine AFs. Not too many women want to be like her, because they want to be liked by other women. AFs are way beyond that. She doesn’t get her identity from other women, but one she alone defines. Both Alphas can be found in nature among the animal kind. Check out the wolves. Study wolf-pack behavior. The AF is unique in that she’s not a bitch, she’s not a saint, she just wins.

An Alpha-Female (AF) is:

1. A woman unafraid to use, and sometimes, exploit her femininity to get her way with men or seal a business deal

2. A woman who is completely in control of her destiny

3. Usually a loner, has a “clique” or a pack when ready, but AFs are cave dwellers and truly blossom when with their complementary half, an Alpha Male. She is dominant over all men and women, except her Alpha male (AFs eat Beta men for breakfast, by the way)

4. Ruthless, more so than a man, because you never see it coming, she’ll smile, then cut ‘ya

5. A woman who cannot be categorized, and will always rise above the stereotype of being “female” or rise above a group; in fact she doesn’t even think she is a “woman” for she is embarrassed to the level many have succumbed to by their emotional recklessness; Former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher once said, “Don’t ask me about being a woman” and she had no female members in her cabinet

6. You immediately know when an AF walks in the room; enters at the same status as the leaders in the room, she glides in; close mouthed smile, eyes canvassing everything for the big swoop down

7. She is full of contradictions often keeping her male partner in a suspended state, not sure exactly what to do with her

8. Have a hard time at work because of their innate leadership skills and can
ruffle the wrong feathers; eventually she manages to rise to the top because of her style and intellect

9. She is not a bitch; and abhors the comparison because she revels in using her sweetness to get her way, not evil

10. She crushes her female competition to get the most wanted man in the room, in fact she revels in her power over men, in fact, men love her for it

I say if there are 10 women in the room, only 1 is really an AF. The AF’s route in life is quite different from that of other women. She’s almost always successful on whatever she focuses on though she may not have gotten there as neat and tidy as everyone else. She has come a long way, and often feels misunderstood as cold, a bitch or a whore. Once she can embrace all of herself to accept her AF nature can she shine. Just don’t cross her ;) For one of my strongest AF characters, check out my book, Mrs. Big who scores a major coup and changes her lifestyle on a dime.

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Comments

17 Responses to “The Alpha-Female–More Than A Woman”

  1. Julissa on October 6th, 2008 12:10 pm

    interesting i always though kimora was one, not tyra at all, she is too whiny, too annoying, too conformatory (is that a word) too much of nothing, good blog!

  2. Anonymous on October 6th, 2008 12:12 pm

    def not an alpha female myself would like to be but i dont think that is something u can fake–when i walk in the room i just try to find a chair and get out of people’s way tryin to come in as invisible as possible, guess i would fail

  3. Anonymous on October 6th, 2008 12:14 pm

    My wife and I are both Alphas. She doesnt try to dominate me or anything and we work together. The post is right about how an alpha female responds to the Alpha Male. We have a truly unique relationship and we both stay in our lanes, but the sex is amazing with an alpha woman :)

  4. Miami, FL on October 6th, 2008 12:27 pm

    I read about this a biology class I took in college and my instructor said that there is a real chemical in the brain that make alphas different than anyone else and how they are the ones who sustain and protect our genetic pool as humans….wow..i wanna be an alpha female :(

  5. An Alpha Female on October 6th, 2008 12:30 pm

    To all the ladies, and gents, who read this and wondering if they are–you are NOT. Though the post didn’t say it, you can only be born with this. You can pick up some traits, but most women if they tried will just turn into a bitch. Alpha females are queens when it comes to seduction of money, power, and men. They will take over the damn company, and come to work the next day with a basket of homemade, chewy cookies for her underlings.

  6. Shannon on October 6th, 2008 12:31 pm

    I was watching desperate housewives last night, and this reminds me, Bri is an Alpha Female, and in SATC, it must be Samantha.

  7. Leah Mullen on October 6th, 2008 12:59 pm

    Interesting post. As a capricorn woman–and because of the way I was raised as an accidental feminist. (Parents told me not to have children, not to get involved with men, to be independent, to be a success.)

    So I have a lot of the qualities (the driven, independent loner) of the alpha female but my motivations are VASTLY different. It’s more about success/survival, but in no way is it about any kind of manipulation or domination.

  8. Anonymous on October 6th, 2008 7:47 pm

    I think people are not animals, and this has nothing to do with feminism. Do women need a special tag to be “strong” “confident” “a leader”? Most alpha females DO NOT have a femine persona at all. The vision of alpha male as the only being to truly understand the alpha female is rediculous! alpha is always closely related to omega. Alpha+Alpha sounds Homoerotic if you ask me!

  9. Anonymous on October 6th, 2008 8:35 pm

    According to Nicola Cairncross a speaker on womens finance and author of the book “The Money Gym” The ultimate wealth workout,says; “Sadly, the clever attractive Alpha woman who has her set on an Alpha man is likely to be disapointed. When Alpha man comes home at night after a day of competing in the boardroom the last thing he wants is to compete with an assertive wife as well. He’s looking for an easy life, someone to stroke his fevered brow and that means marring a feminine, girly BETA woman who doesnt have the masculine traits of her Alpha sister. Check your Alpha at work and bring home the BETA!!

  10. Alpha Male, and I ain't talking bout no fraternity on October 6th, 2008 8:45 pm

    LMAO…I have been watching this blog ALL day. The only person who would have a problem with an Alpha woman is a BETA MAN OR BETA FEMALE. Everyone thinks they have the Alpha Female figured out and they don’t. For the poster who said something about it being hard for her, it is only hard for her if she wants it to be. MOST Alpha Men want an Alpha Female the two get off talking about taking over the world, who the *uck cares about that on a daily basis. As a man, I love my Alpha woman and I got that ass every night. I understand her, and she understands me. I’d never let any woman disrespect me. I’d try a BETA trick (or chick) to drink. Only an Alpha woman can handle me. Not interested in no BETA chick. They can’t help me with the takeover. LOL.

  11. Anonymous on October 6th, 2008 8:49 pm

    I’m a beta man. i’m a laid back type of dude, simple, got a lot of friends, quiet, very sensitive at times. And I’ve always had horrible relationships with Alpha females, almost on the verge that they are verbally abusive to me. They r demanding and loud. Poster is right, they don’t belong with beta men. I never got in a word edge wise, she was always pushing me, pushing me, to be more. i was fine with my job, but she wanted more more. alpha females do belong with alpha males because they are the only ones who can conquer her. i got myself a beta chick right now and we good in the hood.

  12. Anonymous on October 6th, 2008 8:53 pm

    Alpha female = Lonley cat lady

  13. Anonymous on October 7th, 2008 3:47 am

    Alpha Females are queens and the super bottem B in my view. They require an alpha male who they feel comfortable submitting to at home. As you can see Kimora dosent act the same with that new guys as she did with Russ. Russ was weak, the new guys isnt.

    Loving a bottom B

  14. The Alphanista Hall of Fame Vote | Alphanista™ on January 28th, 2009 7:51 pm

    [...] If you need a run down on what alpha traits are please look through the alpha male and alpha female posts detailing their descriptions.  As they comprise quite a few, and even unusual [...]

  15. angelnmo on March 6th, 2010 6:16 pm

    I laugh when I am at an event and watch all those sorry azz women ‘trying’ to be alpha females. I don’t give a flying fu@k what any of the women in the room think about me. I have always gotten along with men far better than women, and I dont have to be the loudest, flashiest woman in the room to feel like an alpha. Silent and strongwilled beats loud all bark, no bite types of women any day. To me, alphas are those women who talk about what they gonna do to a bitch. I just wait till she gets in my face and knock her ass out!

  16. ALPHA FEMALE on May 28th, 2010 5:19 pm

    I’m alpha female but look very feminine. I have found a lot of people are intimidated by me and I hate it. I don’t have very many female friends. Men seem to either like me or hate me. If they hate me it’s because they aren’t usually alpha themselves or suffer from lack of self-esteem. I get along best with other alpha males and yes the sex is always hot with an alpha male. My husband is so not alpha! I wish he was.

  17. Maryann on May 28th, 2010 8:10 pm

    @Alpha may I recommend the Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands by Dr Laura Schlessinger? Excellent book for alpha wives.

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