Weekend Rewind: Ten Reasons Why This Alphanista Won’t be a Cougar
March 12, 2010
Loved this classic. Enjoy!
___________________________________________
By Guest Blogger, Author Wendy Coakley-Thompson
Vivica Fox is hosting a new show called “The Cougar,” in which an older woman lives with twenty hot young guys, eyeing them like life’s a smorgasbord, and she’s one hungry Swede.
I was intrigued.
After all, I wrote a book, What You Won’t Do For Love, in which the main character falls for a younger guy. I get it. Sometimes, you got to get your swerve on. If you want someone to knock it out, then maybe a tadpole is what you need. Men that age are at their sexual peak, and rutting all night is what they do best. But life has taught me some lessons. I’m looking for someone older. Because, in head-to-head combat, older men make the grade. Here’s why:
1. Older men think size is relative. Whether it’s my plus-size figure or a somewhat smaller appendage, older men usually know how to compensate for each so we both get ours.
2. Older men don’t have baby mama drama. Chances are, if you’re seeing an older man with kids, they’re grown and outside the sphere of some vindictive baby mama who can ruin your plans, because she’s mad at something your man did or didn’t do before you even showed up.
3. Older men have seen some things. Even the densest older man has had life experiences that gave him some wisdom that he can share. He’s had problems that are bigger than losing at Madden 09.
4. Older men have been places. Odds are older men have left the country at some point. And Canada doesn’t count; it’s still North America. I want a man who doesn’t think I’m talking about Jamaica when I mention that my family’s from the Bahamas.
5. Older men have their own place. Any older man who’s still living in his mama’s basement at his age is just pathetic, and I wouldn’t be with him.
6. Older men can navigate a woman’s body. Older men tend to have experience on their side. I shouldn’t have to give a man a Mapquest printout and a flashlight for him to find the clitoris.
7. Older men take their time. Because they can’t do much fast anymore, you get quality over quantity – Ruth’s Chris over Mickey D’s. In bed and everywhere else…
8. Older men have a more cultured palate. They tend to appreciate the finer things in life. For some younger men, the only culture they get comes from Dannon.
9. Older men have their own stuff. I’ll quote the comic A.J. Johnson: “It’s not that we want a man with money. We just don’t want to have to lend him any of ours.” ‘Nuff said.
10. Older men appreciate your accomplishments. Secure older men have the good sense to recognize that your achievements complement what they bring to the table.
For all these reasons, I won’t be taking on the cougar mantle anytime soon. Unless, of course, I find a younger man who meets my strict standards. Then it’s on!
For more on our guest blogger, youc an visit her blog The Fiendish Plots of Dr. Wendy Coakley-Thompson at http://wendycoakley-thompson.blogspot.com, on MySpace, and on Facebook.
Email This Post
Loading ...
Older men are better these women with these young men are kidding themselves I know Vivica has to eat but she’s a joke, sad case. If you stay single too long as a woman u go crazy and do crazy things!
I want an older man too. 9 and 10 are one of the features i am looking for. I don’t have time to play around. I need a man who is done playing and know what he wants.
Older men want younger women! Point Blank.
Older men are the best at EVERYTHING!!! I am 23 and men less than 10 years my senior disgust me!! Older man with a younger women is definitely more compatible. Women that date men significantly younger want someone to take care of or is at the same (low) maturity level as the man….in my opinion.
(this one)
Sorry Ladies but I have to respectfully disagree. Women should make the best of the situation whatever the man’s age. I could never discriminate on someone because of their age nor willingly accept someone for the same reason. It’s just crazy to think this way. Everything center’s around me, it’s all about what they can teach me so I’m willing to accept the lessons from the young and old. And, if they give me a reason to move on I’ll do so without hesitation.
I bet if you take this conversation to Mariah Carey, Halle Berry, Tameka or Kim K. they’d respectfully disagree as well.
You will learn NOTHING from a younger man! All those women are KNOWN twits….and that’s why they have younger men….
I als beg to differ. I have had an older man (16 years older) and he was caring, but still a bit childish as far as the relationship. He also was comfortable with marrying numerous times and making the SAME mistake each time and wanted me to be his girl through two of them. I am sure that he doesn’t represent all and he is not the first older guy that I have talked to. The other were either married, controlling, and insecure with themselves.
Give me an equally yoked man that cares about my well being anyday.
My younger man (3 years) actually has all of those traits and does not believe in living with his momma and/ or a female unless he is married to them. He respects me and can do it anyway (fast or slow) that I ask. He also knows my body by the back of his hand.
I think it is the man, not age and the same for women. Not everyone is mature or conscious of many of these thiongs because they never took the time to care about them. As women we just need to really pay close attention to who and what we are dealing with.
Inclusive statements will never win an argument. Actually I dated a younger guys & I learned a lot. On top of that I loosened up & we had a lot of fun.
Did I strike a cord b/c you come across upset in your last statement?
As a former “cougar”, I can say that there are some younger men worth a second look. Fortunately my former “eight year younger than I” husband, (the marriage ended for reasons other than age) was far more mature than most of the older men I have dated. I do have to confess that I did from time to time wonder if I was seen as woman fooling herself…..but I think sometimes you get lucky and age “IS” just a number.
No chord struck….its just that in this phase of my life, I cannot see myself with somebody less than 10 years my senior….keep in mind that I am only 23 so I don’t have many peers that fit my prerequisites…not much to choose from. An older man to me is 30 and up.
Cougars are fooling themselves. They have been overlooked by men their own age for so long they start not to care that folk will look at them with the side eye.They are puttin on ed hardy cut-off tees and pum-pum shorts flashing their child bearing stomach wrinkles and putting their gravity pulled mamories on display trying to fool the youngins into thinking they still got it! Look at Linda Hogan. So SAD.
Mike has a point