POLL: Do Black Women Need To Be Re-Educated?

reeducationcover1I was clicking through one of my new favorite blogs Feministe, because though I don’t consider myself one, it gets the oil in my engine going because we disagree on the fundamentals.

I came across a discussion about a book called The Re-Education of The Female by Dante Moore.  I’m all for being enlightened on the rights and wrongs of the world.  But as I read, I agreed that this is bullshit.  Why are these books ALWAYS directed at black women?  Why are the writers black men?  The best way to “fix” the problem with women is for women to teach other.  Women set the tone of the community and in their relationships with men.  If men are protectors, women are sustainers.  Once women start “behaving” accordingly, men follow suit.

Look at African countries, many of them are matriarchal societies where women live happily with their man and love and respect him, at the same time.  The “female” does need some “re-visioning” or “re-thinking” especially the younger ones who still have a chance to avoid the pitfalls.  Perhaps, we should consider a school for women, run by women who need to teach women how to be better this or that.

Because I am frankly tired of men taking this upon themselves.  That is not their job, it is ours.  Take the poll!

Do Black Women Need To Be Re-Educated?

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  1. EbonyLolita says:

    If you want to learn about Men then ask Men. But, I don’t advise you to ask the man that your in a relationship with. He’s not gonna tell you the secrets on having the upper hand on him or the shenanigans his counterparts play. I have a BFF that is a Man, not a male but a MAN. I grew up a single child so I never had the advantage of having a “protective brother(s)” But, I had a FANTABULOUS FATHER. I learned from him that a Man does what he says he is going to do, a Man is responsible and takes care of his Wife/Children by ensuring their financial/emotional/physical well being. As I got older I had my heart hurt, but never stayed in a situation for a 2nd round of mistreatment. However, my GF’s did and still do. I noticed that they never had a Man around to give them the real deal and often got burnt 2 or more times by the same Tiyad situation. I do not take man advice from women, b/c the advice they might give you they rarely follow. I’m one of the few women that stands tried and true in my advice to my friends which is why I’m single and hold myself to a high level of excellence, the same level that I expect from my Mate.

    Women need to be re-educated b.c they’ve fallen stupid to the lies and manipulation from Bad Boyfriends and Abusers, not the Honest Truth from Good Black Men. But hey, shrugs, what do I know I just post comments on this Fantabulous Blog 😉

    Love, EbonyLolita 🙂

  2. hiphopmuse says:

    I have to agree with THC and then Goldie on this one…I’ve learned most of my game from men, but I’ve learned what works for me by my own experiences. I believe you can learn a lot from men if you keep your ears open and let them talk. A real ass dude (platonic friend or lover) will keep it 100 with you. You would be surprised how much men open up to you if you facilitate an environment where they feel like they can open up and talk to you.

    I also believe that most men want a good woman, it just has to be the right woman. But best believe they will take advantage of women who allow them to do so. Men will treat you only as bad as you allow them to.

  3. GOLDIE says:

    I will learn for myself what works for me. I have to teach myself.
    What do I allow people to say to me?
    What I allow people to call me?
    What image and impression do I project?

    I dont think everyone is capable of learning to be better. It’s easier to be worshipped by a man for your good deeds when there are women doing horrible jobs of it elsewhere.

  4. Zabeth says:

    @Adrienne. I agree women are doing their fair share to keep themselves single. BUT, IMO when men give women relationship advice it’s done to keep them single and avaialable either for themselves or for their homeboys- for all of the reasons you listed above. If you take a look around the community right now men have a relatively abundant supply of women willing to supply them with no strings attached sex, babies, relationships with no real committment (“it’s complicated”), and to fulfill all of the traditional wifely duties without having to be an actual wife. And yes, women are complicit in this too. And yes some women will give you bad advice so that they can take your man or keep you in the single boat with them. But think about it, is a man really going to tell a woman (who desires a relationship with a committment) to wait for sex until she’s better evaluated the man or will he probably tell her to jump into the sack and freak him, then see what happens? I’m betting the latter. Is a man really going to give you good advice about how to evaluate another man? Probably not- unless he’s your Daddy.

    I guess I’m more inclined to trust a woman rather than a man. And perhaps it’s the case that both sides bring certain necessary perspectives to the table.

  5. Ummmm..

    I got most of my game from men.

    From finances to sex, I was taught mainly by men. Men tell me what they desire and I deliver, and in exchange I tell them what I desire and they reciprocate.

    I would N-E-V-E-R take relationship advice from a woman. NEVER!

    And not because there is anything wrong with her or her advice, but MOST women are 99.999% clueless when it comes to men. Even happily married women are extremely clueless. Look at the situation with Steve McNair and the Gov of S. Carolina. Both happily married but choose to cheat for whatever reasons.

    THOSE are the secrets I want to learn, and you just can’t learn those things from another woman! You can only learn the intentions of a man from a man.

    So if I’m looking for advice on how to have a lasting relationship, I go to my male source!

  6. Adrienne says:

    @Zabeth why would BM what BW to be single? It doesn’t benefit them at all….who will wash their clothes and have their babies? Cook their food. You need to be realistic. Women are MAKING themselves single.

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