Loyalty is rational, faithfulness is emotional.
Emotions change. People fluctuate. They come, they go. Yes, even after 30 years together, and not by death.
When a man is loyal:
Nothing can make him leave his wife, nothing. NATHAN. Even if she damn near kills the kids, he will stand by her. You’ve seen it in the news. When that mother was accused of killing her 5 kids, and that husband did not divorce her. Eventually, when the dust settled he remarried. But he stayed through the thickest part.
Loyalty is when a man wanders but stays home. He and his wife have more than the law keeping them together, but almost a cosmic, mystical connection. It’s as if his right arm was cut off. Leaving her would make him a completely different man, maybe even one who doesn’t want to live without her. If they do break up, better believe it didn’t have to do with another person, another baby, or another secret family.
Lots of men think they are loyal, who doesn’t want to be? It’s honorable, it’s good, it’s masculine. But most women do not know what it is, to ask for it, and most men do know know what it is, to do it. But understand with loyalty, comes a high price most women couldn’t even imagine.
Faithfulness is what 99% of people have. Yes, you do too. It’s when you are together, and someone cheats. The abandonment may not happen then and there, but eventually if the right person comes along, under the right circumstances, it’s on. They are gone. In fact, many men have told me they wish they could get kicked out just to get out of the marriage, or have her break up with him, so he could be free. The good thing about faithfulness is it provides flexibility. A few women have told me the same.
These days, most folks want an exit clause, so who wins? loses? So, figure this all out and what’s more important to you. It will take the burden off lots.
Understand that when one person decides it’s over, it usually is. But loyalty can live on.