Dating Like A White Woman: How My IR Relationship Began

This series will take a first -person look into IR relationships without all the politics but reflection.

by Michaela Cunningham

I didn’t start out trying  interracial dating. I stumbled into it.

Literally. I was downtown traipsing around a Barnes & Noble store one afternoon, killing a little time while waiting for a Sunday matinee. I was going to see Legally Blonde, the musical (yes, yes, I know; it’s not your standard soul sister fare. But I’d had enough of movie theaters and wanted to see something live. The Color Purple wasn’t in town, but  Legally Blonde was. What can I say? I had to start somewhere).

I couldn’t get any of my girlfriends to go with me so I was there on my own.

I rounded the corner in Barnes & Noble, thinking I could grab a cup of coffee and read a magazine. Intent on following the direction of the smell of freshly ground coffee beans, I didn’t notice a stack of books piled up in the aisle. I stumbled over the books and would have landed flat on my face if the gentleman who’d placed them there hadn’t broken my fall. Instead of my face meeting the carpet, I looked up into a pair of anxious blue eyes. Baby blue eyes, I might add, attached to a good-looking face. Framed by a head full of blond hair. This same head, mind you, sat on a trim, fit, 6’3” frame. Ahem. Stop. The. Presses.

Blondie apologized profusely and insisted on buying me a coffee. It turned out that he too had a weak spot for musicals and, like me, was killing time till the matinee started. It also turned out that he didn’t have a date for the musical. He hoped he wasn’t being forward but would I be interested in seeing if we could sit together? Um, YEAH. (Come on, now! Would you say???)

Blondie – I mean Sam – enjoyed the musical with me and grabbed souvenirs and snacks for both of us during intermission.  Sam also asked me if I wanted to end the evening with dinner. We found a quaint café a few blocks away from the music hall and continued talking – and talking and talking and talking. We talked our way right into a decision to begin an interracial relationship. Scary? Heck yes! Were we going to pass each other up because we were of different ethnicities? Heck no! It was a first for both of us, but the chemistry we experienced was undeniable and we felt we owed it to ourselves to explore it more.

Next month – Girlfriends weigh in



  1. Sirita says:

    Great story! Seems like a organic and divine connection. You could not have “planned” those circumstances unless you were writing a hollywood screen play. I can’t wait to read more!

  2. Lexi says:

    Lovely! What a random beginning though, you just never know huh! lol! Would love to read more as well. =)

  3. Michaela C says:

    @Lisa – Thanks so much! I’ll share my girlfriends’ responses next blog . . .

    @Christelyn – Thanks! Definitely more to come . . .

    @Deja – Thanks!

    @Lindah – If there appeared to be an emphasis on Sam’s blue eyes and blonde hair, it’s only because it just made him “so” White. For someone who had previously never entertained the thought of an IR, his eyes and hair color held a certain *irony.* LOL!

    @Amandax & Mishe – Thanks for your interest.

    @Mike – Yes, we’re still dating. He’s definitely courting me . . . . *Batts eyes* LOL!

  4. Lindah says:

    This is how it is usually done when you least expect it. This writer was able to keep herself open and not judge this man by his looks or taste. But I wonder if the writer was looking for a white man. Why the over emphasis on his blonde hair and his blue eyes. It just seems like a fixation than general attraction.

  5. amandax says:

    What a way to meet a man! Loves it. He was going to watch Legally Blonde? I hope you both had a laugh over that one.

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