Good Life: Go Where No Woman Goes
February 17, 2009
An alpha female travels light
Alpha females travel far, travel solo.
For many, this is how they seek to whet their more adventuresome sides. On vacation, she may have an affair, or a Mai Tai, it depends which direction the wind is blowing.
If she’s single, she’ll go alone. In fact, an alpha female may have been traveling alone since her early 20s. When I was 25, I took my first trip alone to Spain, Portugal, and Gibraltar. It was a trip that changed my life and refined my taste in wine and food. Europe can do that. But most importantly, it taught me how other women live, and how much happier other women are outside of the U.S. Damn, traveling taught me how to be a woman.
Too bad, not enough women are comfortable traveling alone because of the proverbial “I don’t have anyone to talk to.” Most alpha females on vacation draw people to them. Not the crazies, just the normal folk who, get this–want to take care of her. I was reading an article in Bon Apetit and the writer said “There’s nothing like being a woman alone in the world. People just want to take care of you.” They look out for you. They approach you, talk to you, and invite you to places. They make sure you eat. But it takes a certain aura or woman to welcome this. You can’t be the easily offended or made uncomfortable type. No. You have to be the type that likes to eat at the table of life and savor everything bit by bit.
On one of my trips to Mexico, Manzanillo to be exact, a small fisherman’s town, I was invited to go to lunch with the resort’s owner and some friends. It was off the resort. I had shared dinners with the owner during my stay, and got to know him [and his sugar baby]. His luxury resort is like a fantasy, by the way.
A few days later, I found myself at the most exquisite dinner on a hill top at the home of two millionaire, gay, Mexican architects with servants. I drank tequila in the little sangrita chaser tube, ate cactus for the first time and other stuff. I shared a table with them and two, blue-blood, oil folks from Texas. It was an odd mix, but we all got along eating delicious food, and talking life. One of my most memorable moments that wouldn’t have happened, if I was too nervous, too afraid of life.
Remember, that alpha female post that asked, “Do you say Hello World!” when you enter or room, or “Hello World?” It’s obvious what I say. And no, not all my solo vacations are blissful, but I know I did my part.
Oh, and that Mexican trip was at a little fantasy island resort. Really, on the low. I won’t give the name. Sometimes, an alpha female likes to keep things to herself. You can find tons of solo traveling websites or just book a flight and hotel package on Orbitz and wing it. But I will tell you, that I went to Paris with this phenomenal group of women last year called Black Paris Divas. Yes, alpha females can travel with others.
Because at some point, you need somebody to watch your bags when you go to the bathroom.
So, what places have you traveled to by yourself? What places would you like to visit without a man [you can call it "research" for your honeymoon...lol]?
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Yes, traveling abroad always makes you a little more cultured, aware, and open! And YES the women on that blackparisdiva’s tour were fabulous! It opened my eyes too all sorts of things that I would have never experienced in the US like those crapes from the street vendors, going to the Dordogne and ding on Foie gras and Kir! Fabulous times indeed!
Great post! Unfortunately when I travel I see very few black women on the plane or anywhere; if it’s to the Caribbean they are there, but any other place is nill. There’s always that “afraid of flying” excuse. Yeah, ok. Live!
So important that a woman be cultured enough to bring something to the table but not too much that she’s done it all. I have traveled alone to the Caribbean, and east Asia. Looking forward to traveling with a man again. Nothing beats that. But if it’s Italy, I’d do that a-l-o-n-e.
…guy here.
There’s nothing more appealing than to interact with a woman who is accepting of others, cultured, and humble. Traveling and experiencing different ways of life in different countries is a great way to develop those characteristics. Sure you can acquire them stateside, but having lived and vacationed abroad, I can recommend travel as a definite good way, as well.
Alone or not, make it happen.
I traveled alone to Hawaii,for a conference, but I did meet up with friends there. The journey was really neat. I meet an older gentlemen and his grandson. They were Italian and I knew from looking at his clothes that he had good taste. We had a very wonderful conversation. I won’t forget it.
I’m quite the young thing but I crave to go out alone. I want to travel to another country very soon. I think next paycheck I will start setting up my travel expenses acct. fancy.
@Goldie I definitely rec setting up an travel exp acct to give urself nice little upgrades from first class to the suite, it takes time but if you put $50-$150 dollars away every month you’d be surprised, especially if your bills and such are under control, and if it’s money from a sugar daddy def bank that
during the winter break some years back as a waitress i used to put my tip money in the bank(it was in the same area) everyday, and then transfer it to where need be. bills. savings. I will start doing this bi-weekly.
Great post. My birthday is coming up and I want it to be all about me, but had been trying to find some accompaniment to share the experience with who won’t be a party pooper. But I am encouraged to save some money and just send me on a fabulous trip!
I have been traveling alone 6 months out of the year for the past 5 years. As of March 11th, 2009, I have been traveling alone in Australia and having a ball! In past years, I have been to Europe many times, Hawaii, all over the states and Mexico – all on solo trips. Ladies, if you are thinking about traveling but have fears, get over them. Get online, book your trip, pack your bag and go go go!!!!!
I am documenting this OZ trip on my blog: http://www.theonyxtraveler.com. I have already planned trips that will have me traveling for the next year at least.
Live your beautiful life now!!
Cheers,
Sheila
I went to Puerto Rico for three days last February all myself and it was great! I was so good to just do me on my time.