Dear Alphanista, I CONFESS….

I returned from vacation with a inbox jammed with advice emails and well, you know, confessions, too!  Remember, that?  So, in case you are feeling a little guilty about something you are not alone

1)  I have a crush on a much younger woman.  I dream and fantasize about her like nobody’s business.  Every time she posts new photos on Facebook, I am all over them, salivating, throbbing, oh my god, this girl is just hot!  She lives far away and I am her “mentor”.  However, I dream nothing more than to &*& her like yesterday’s beef stew.  Problem is, I am a woman and like I said, she looks up to me.  I don’t know what to do.  She thinks it’s all professional, but I really could care less about her aspirations.  I just feel like a dirty ole lady.

2)  Damn.  Please don’t judge. I been with my lady for 5 years and she has a 19 year old.  My lady is young had her kid young, too.   I guess you know where this is going right?  Well my lady say she can’t have sex because of some medical problem.  Doc told her she need to reduce sex for a while until she heals.  A little gap in time turned into a damn bridge.  One night me and her daughter had sex.  Man I can’t tell you the most powerful feeling that was.  I was doing things to her daughter I ain’t even do to her mama for “religious” reasons.  Daughter is a bad ass.  Can’t wait until my lady goes back in the hospital. Yum….

3)  I steal from my church’s offering box at last twice a month.  And if you think nobody else does think again.  How do they expect us to survive as volunteers or minimum wage?  When the offering goes around Sunday I am one of the main persons that take it in the backroom. I stuff as many twenties and envelopes as I can in my bra and purse.  So far I collected over $2000 in a month’s  time. Praise the Lord.

4) My wedding is in February to my fiance.  I have a 6 year old child that my ex thinks is his but it is really my fiance. We have been banking the child support.  Fool shoulda asked for a DNA.

5)  Just got a major job after 2 years unemployment!  But my resume is a lie.  I switched it up and put in everything they want to hear to get an interview with new dates, job titles, certificates, etc.  Somehow they did not verify I hope they do not find out.

If you have a confession please keep it short and send it to confessions@alphanista.com.  Everything is anonymous.  We get lots of emails, so please be patient. Thank you for sharing your secrets!

 Email This Post