Category: Archives

5 Things I’ll Never Get Used To As An Alphanista

newyorkBy Guest Blogger Te-Erika Patterson

People staring at me
What the hell are you looking at? You’ve never seen a raw ass b*tch with a short cut before?! Damn! Just go ahead and take out your camera and ask me for a picture while you’re at it!

People asking me for advice
What in the hell? Do I look like a counselor to you? I haven’t even made my first million yet- you’re the one driving the Beemer! Just because I don’t give a damn about what you think (and you wanna be more like that) doesn’t mean at any given moment I’m willing to listen to your problems and teach you how to think. Here’s my main piece of advice so you won’t have to ask me again. “F**k what they think about you!”

Dudes walking up to me with hard-on’s
Dude! Control your penis. Why in the hell are you introducing yourself to me and your ding-a-ling is about to poke me in the belly? Go BUY some kitty kat if it’s that serious. Just because you did that, I’m NEVER having sex with you!

Invitations to go party-hopping
Hell NO I’m not going to South Beach with you when we just met! I know you just want to show me off and pretend like you have a hot girlfriend when I am not even trying to give you any booty. Take it slow. Let me see that you deserve to have me as your trophy for an evening. Don’t think you can boost your star quality by rolling with me and you haven’t even paid any of my bills yet.

Women asking me to go shopping with them
The truth is— I hate to shop! I just throw on a mixture of stuff from my closet to create my signature style. I’m not your personal stylist. I am not going to the mall with you to help you put together your look. Create your own style and if you can’t, just go with the simple way to be glam. Buy a white wife beater and wear your favorite pair of jeans with a pair of heels (the color or style of heels doesn’t matter). Go inside the dollar store and find the craziest pair of earrings you see and a bracelet that does not match. Put it all together. Go out and be admired.

Honorable Mention
Being so popular but being so lonely
Why is it that everyone wants my advice, my attention and my time yet…every night I’m on facebook and twitter just itching for a conversation? I haven’t gotten any in MONTHS and I never go out and relax and socialize. I’m so focused on ‘becoming’ that I sometimes forget to just ‘BE’. I’m tired of this solitary confinement. I feel like Ariel in the Little Mermaid. ~singing~ I wanna be where the people are….

To find out more about this guest blogger, please go to

It’s Open! Privy To Members-Only

“Behind” this blog  there are ladies doing something you can’t see and a forum tingling with activity.

Alphanistas are plotting the takeover!  Well, we’re talking about it.   Over the next 6 months from June-December, members of the Alphanista Inner Circle will have access to articles, resources, experts in every area of their life they want to enhance from health, relationships, spirituality, business, money, and home.  What the Alphanista Inner Circle does is take the blog articles a step further and the interaction in the forums is a plus.

Right now, Alphanistas are reading the “Getting Started”, and we’re introducing ourselves in the forum.  Can’t you hear the chitter, chatter?

It launched today at midnight….There are ONLY 7 days to sign up and then we close the doors.  We’ve got to focus!  But before you do anything, read here for all the details on what you get and how to sign up.

Any questions email me directly at

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Why Bother With The Master Cleanse?

There’s a lot of buzz surrounding the Master Cleanse.

Lately it seems like every Hollywood actress or actor who needs to get in shape is turning to this decades old health system that involves drinking a mixture of lemon juice, maple syrup, and cayenne pepper.

With all the diets out there to choose from why would anyone bother with the Master Cleanse?

There’s two main reasons people like the Master Cleanse. The first (and most obvious) is that it works. The results people are getting with the Master Cleanse border on miraculous, and they are backed by thousands of devoted users who are living testimonials to the effectiveness of the Master Cleanse.

The second reason people choose the Master Cleanse over other diets and wellness programs is that it’s fast. The typical person only spends 10 days on the Master Cleanse, compared to other diets that can last months or even years you can see why they choose the Master Cleanse.

Another interesting thing about the Master Cleanse lasting just 10 days is that you only need a short term burst of will power to get through it. Having to sacrifice for months is what makes other diets so hard to stay on, but most people can will their way through 10 days.

What can you expect from 10 days on the Master Cleanse?

Even though most people are going on the Master Cleanse to lose weight quickly, there’s many other health benefits to be gained by doing the Master Cleanse. Flushing out your system is what the Master Cleanse is really designed to do. Even back 60 years ago when the Master Cleanse was first invented people had health problems as a result of waste building up inside of them. Today with processed foods, pollution, and all around poor diets our bodies desperately need to be flushed out every once in a while.

When you flush out your body with the Master Cleanse the waste you eliminate will be abnormal. The smell, color, and texture of the waste that comes out of your body shocks some people, so you should be prepared.

If you want to try the Master Cleanse there’s more you need to know then just drinking the lemonade mixture for 10 days. In fact most people who try the Master Cleanse without knowing all the steps fail. If you think the Master Cleanse is something you would like to try there’s a good book here that you should read before starting the Master Cleanse because it covers the common problems people face, and how to avoid them.

Still want to join me on the Master Cleanse?  Email me at

WEEKEND REWIND: How To Tame An “Alphanista”

By Guest Blogger Te-Erika Patterson

If you’re up for a challenge, your relationship with an Alphanista will be the most frustrating, yet exhilarating ride that you’ve ever experienced- that is, if you know how to navigate the rocky terrain.

Sometimes I meet men who have so much potential but they just don’t get it. With a free spirit like me, you have to operate differently. The same rules that you’ll use with the average woman who uses her skills in the kitchen or the bedroom to snag her man won’t work with me.

Although there will never be a definitive guide to taming an Alphanista, (because she can not be tamed) following these suggestions will get you closer to your goal- the rest is up to God.

Be Consistent
You have to be consistent, mainly because I’m not. My preferences or taste buds can shift whenever the wind blows and I am energized by the complete freedom to change my mind on a whim. It’s challenging enough to wake up and decide what I want out of life “today” so I need a man who means what he says and does what he promises to do, day in and day out. Since most people alter their opinions to match mine, a man who is consistent with his preferences, expectations and actions provides the kind of structure that translates erotically.

Say Yes
You don’t say “no” when I see something pretty because you don’t have to. Your finances are not shaken by the state of the economy because your resources are long and strong. Even if you do lose out on a business venture, you have 5 more right behind it that are flourishing. You believe I deserve the best that life has to offer and you know it’s your responsibility to give it to me. I’m your fantasy woman and you’re not about to spoil your dream come true by not being able to give me my heart’s desires.  There’s nothing that delights you more than watching my eyes twinkle as I give you a kiss after trying on one of your sparkly gifts or receiving a phone call from a business connection that you supplied. Thank you!

Correct Me
Yes, I do run shit in most situations and it is completely within my reach to do so elegantly but spending so much time teaching and molding others can take a toll on the psyche of an Alphanista. Don’t abuse this gift but I want to give you the secret; I like
being taught and corrected by my man. If you can teach me something that will add to the success of my business endeavors I will definitely keep you around longer. And…every once in while, I need to be reminded that I am a mere mortal. An intentional, open handed smack to my rump will revitalize me and I will thank you for it.

Feed Me
I like to eat. You bring the food. That’s your job every single day. Show up to my place empty handed and that proves you don’t give a damn about me or my well-being. Goodbye.

Let It Slide
Sometimes the line between work and play can be blurred, at least in my mind. I have to be the hard ass to get things done and sometimes I carry that attitude home with me. I apologize in advance but you will just have to learn to deal with it. Don’t fight me on it. Let me rant and rave and try to strong arm you into doing the dishes. Instead of overanalyzing my requests- Do the dishes. It doesn’t take away from your role as my man. When I come down off of my power trip, I’ll realize what I’ve done and you’ll benefit from an apology you’ll never forget.

Let Me Love You
Yes, I have a whole list of people whose main desire is to please me but I have a sweet side too. I want to spoil you and pamper you and be your trophy too. I want you to brag to your friends about how well I take care of you and how much I add to your success. Don’t fight me when I want to do something nice for you. You deserve it just as much as I do. Let me take you on a trip and buy you something nice. Let me sweep you off your feet. Allow me to use my powers for good in appreciation for the wonderful man that you are. Let me love you in all of the extravagant, calculated ways that I know how because…I want to. Isn’t it your job to give me what I want? Uh huh…That’s right.

Read more about this writer at

The Virgin Monologues: Court Me


An alphanista knows there’s more than one way to win…especially when the “old way” hasn’t done much for ‘ya….

By Guest Blogger, Gladys Wilson (ohthesweet)

Courting has been around for all time and some people have embraced, while others have shunned it.

Practicing Christians embrace courting as a way to develop a relationship with the opposite sex and remain with in the guidelines set by God. The main goal of courting is to see if your partner is the right one for you to marry. That is the sole goal. People who court do not date.

I feel that anybody, Christian or not can decide to court. Courting is a way of forming a relationship that can heal old wounds or keep your heart from being shredded to pieces. The number one rule of courting is no sex. No sex of any kind.

However, courting is more than not having a sexual relationship with a person. It is deeper than that. It is seeing the person for who they truly are, without the cloudiness and emotions that come along with a sexually involved relationship. When you court someone, you become their friend and they become yours. If the person is compatible with you, then you create a deep bond, which will last a lifetime.

Six ways to ensure your courting relationship is successful:

1 Make sure that courting is right for you. Have to believe in it, have self control and be disciplined.

2 Tell your intended partner about your goals up front. For example, explain to them your intentions of courting.

3 Chose to visit with each other in open setting or by doing character building activities.

4 Dress modestly, to avoid giving off the wrong message. You can wear clothes that are flattering to your figure without it saying Motel 6.

5 Get to know each others families, and friends that will tell you a lot about your partner.

6 Always be fully aware of your partners faith based beliefs and how those beliefs play out in their lives.

Courting is fun and although it is not emotion free, you can end a courting relationship on mutual agreement, because both you and your partner will be fully aware of your feelings or lack thereof towards each other. Yes, your heart will ache a little, but it will not break in several tiny pieces.

To find out more about our guest blogger, please go to

Thigh High Love


By Guest Blogger, Goldie

Thigh High Boots, even more than last year, are big this season.

So is the intimidation to slide into a pair but avoid looking like a streetwalker. There are heeled versions and flat versions.

If you are conservative, go for a flat, equestrian style and if it does have heels, keep the heel chunky. I assume that if you’re conservative eye skims over the spiked studded thigh high leather boots, you might assume they are not for you. Not that pair, no. But Tory Burch is a brand you might check into. She offers a preppy version of season’s trends.

Platforms and embellishments are for the daring. The only argument I’ll forward is the more embellishments applied to the boot, the less wear you can get of it. Purple, studded boots with a platform won’t spread through your wardrobe like a flat pair of brown thigh highs. Be practical. How many times are you planning on wearing this pair? So why are you spending 80 bucks on a pair from Wet Seal when you plan on wearing them once a week? They’ll show wear in a month or less. Quality is everything in shoes, I can’t say that enough.

Let me also add there are do’s and dont’s to these boots:

  • DO wear skinny jeans and leggings with them. Depending on the style and fabric of the shaft of the boot, stuffing the fabric into your jeans will show.
  • DONT wear anything that its hemlines don’t touch midthigh unless you are wearing tights or leggings underneath a short top.
  • DONT wear the heeled versions with miniskirts during the day. Enough said
  • DO use this as a time to layer up on some accessories. Like a loose tissue-weight cashmere scarf, hat, or Snood(elliptical scarf the has enough volume to double as a hood)
  • DO research companies that make slimmers boot shafts, wide boot shafts, or even a cobbler who can do the work for you. Not everyone can just buy a pair of boots.

Last, try it! Go to the store and try them on. Sometimes, you have to see it on you to be convinced of what a fox you are in them. Alphanistas aren’t afraid of a challenge so get out there and go for it.

Weekend Rewind: Tip 7 How To Be An Alpha Female

“An alpha female is full of contradictions often keeping her male partner in a suspended state, not sure exactly what to do with her…”

A man will never forget an alpha female.

There’s usually that one man or woman in our life, okay sometimes two or three that stand out from the rest. Rest assured that if you’re an alpha female, you may be the bar he’s holding other women up against. You may be the prototype those poor, other unassuming females have to compete with. You’re the proverbial phantom in the relationship that never seems to go away. One of the reasons is that, though the alpha female is well put together and straightforward, and a very reasonable woman, a man may never really know if she’s coming in through the front door or the back.

One week it may be hot with an alpha female—phone calls, bubbly, dining, soft whispers, giggly moments on the phone together, then the next week she is gone—doesn’t return phone calls, disappears for a few days, is elusive, reserved. It’s all something that may be planned or not. But she’ll usually keep an air of mystery, until she finds her compatible alpha male.  In the meantime, she will keep men in suspended states. Oftentimes, this may cost her a few good ones along the way. Why is she like this? Because she can’t completely be herself until she can see her future in this man’s eyes.  It may be a life long quest, but until that magnificent feeling, it’s all up for review.  On another note:  Beta men don’t quite have a handle on the alpha female and quickly take any form of distance as a sign of rejection. This is a red flag for an alpha female.

Beta men are easily offended, move on quickly, because they are quite undecisive. They are not the top pick among women so their egos are softer and they need to go through more women to find the right one. Where as the alpha male who is the top pick, finds his alpha females more of a challenge, a woman to be conquered. He may not react right away, and spend time with betas, but eventually he’ll make his way back to her. He has more women around him to choose from, and because of his need to sire alpha children he will choose his alpha female counterpart if she’s available (unfortunately, she usually isn’t because her numbers are few) to mate with. These unions usually create something spectacular in way of legacy and alpha progeny. Now, he can move on, but an alpha female won’t let him get away that easily, especially if he’s of high net worth 😉 or social status.

It’s so much easier to have our way with beta men. Until we meet our alpha male, and some of us are married to him, that is when we can be our true selves. As I said, something about an alpha male, when I see him, I walk differently, and I am like the soft petals of a rose around him—light, calm and relaxed. I fall right into my lane.

But if an alpha female has zoned in on an alpha male, be careful. She’s very persistent in making her presence known. She knows what she wants. She won’t stop until he catches her.

To find out more about living like an ALPHANISTA, sign up to get more info

about the Alphanista Inner Circle, the members-only site (if you haven’t yet)!

The Alphanista Manifesto For 2009

One of my favorite photos on the blog, an "alphanista" in the making, never stops until she gets the trophy, love her posture, too. Get it, girl!

(No new posts today because of New Year’s Day)

Earlier this week, I asked several of you to post your themes for 2009!  We don’t do list of goals, too pedestrian, too easy to skip and feel bad all over again.  We are about being proactive around here mixed with a little bitchin’ about life now and then.  It’s about using our own power to have dominion over our life, our thoughts, our goals, and our dreams.  2009 can be just another year.  No one said you had to go out and build a skyscraper, rescue a baby, or save the whales.   Choose to name 2009 something you can handle and organize your life around that theme.   Keep it simple, keep it manageable, keep it memorable.  Below are some themes from Alphanista readers. I also threw in a few news ones.  These all have their own special meaning to the reader, but maybe you can derive own.

See yours?

The Year of Growth and New Opportunities!

The Year of Over Indulgence in Self’!

The Year of The Harvest!

The Year of Renewal, Restoration and Reconnection!

The Year of Transformation!

The Year of Increased Income!

The Year of Spirituality and Fitness!

The Year of “The Ring”!

The Year of Let Go! and Let God!

The Year of Manifest Destiny!

The Year of the Star Player!

The Year of the Takeover!

The Year of Order!

The Year of  “Yes”!

Mine is the “Harvest” because I’ve done lots of action oriented plans in the last few years, that I am ready to sit back and see what I’ve given birth to and what is birthing on its own.  Without anymore dibbling and dabbling on my part.  So, whether it’s the Year of “yes” where you’ll say yes to more, transform your self concept, or just let go, and let God, do it your way, nobody else’s.

Don’t forget our Free Teleclass is tomorrow and the “Let Go” ebook is available for purchase which many of you have grabbed already.  I hope you found this blog helpful, especially in getting through the rough patches of the holidays.  It’s only 2 months old, but with your help, it’s received more than 10,000 unique visitors.

In the meantime, savor each minute of 2008.  You don’t know what awaits.  The best gift is the present.

Thank you for the support!

Happy New Year.

A Word From Alphanista™

Thank you again to all the new subscribers we’ve had in the last several weeks.  Some of you have been in touch with me about the blog and had questions.  Below are some things you need to know:

1.    If you are a subscriber and have an idea, alpha article or question, please email it to me at  Articles should be between 300-500 words.  We are always looking for guest bloggers!  One of the top commentators, Ms. Tee (author Te-Erika Patterson) was one of our latest.  But you don’t have to be an “expert”.

2.    If you like the blog, you’ll love one of my 5 books published by St. Martins Press.   Most of the topics and articles we bitch about on here can be found in my books drawn out with characters, circumstances and real life solutions.  Thank you for those who’ve purchased a book, and to those who thought about it.  What books?  Please scroll down and then take a look at the right of your screen >>>>>>.  This blog is only the tip of the iceberg of what you can learn.  All the main female characters in my books are alpha females, and you know where there are alpha females, an alpha male is not far behind.

As always I appreciate your support of the blog.  It’s not just something to do for me, but something I look forward to everyday in working to meet your needs and stay true to the Alphanista™ empowerment message of doing it your way (even if it means breaking rules), and doing it big.  It’s a business for me, a fun, engaging, and enriching way of bringing more people into my world because “sharing is caring”.  I will be offering some new products soon, too, because this is a lifestyle, not just a word. But first, a free thank you product coming up in the next few weeks.  Until then, stay tuned!