I’ve broken up with my emotionaly draining boyfriend.
I’ve allowed men to take me out and I’m looking for charities to attend. I’m on a roll. However, I don’t know what to do about this particular older white gentlemen. He’s a bit loud for my taste and screaming “mid life crisis” but I enjoy the lifestyle he brings.There’s also a music-industry-behind-the-scenes guy, that I’m pretty cool with. I am interested in them both for the lifestyle obviously. Anyways, there’s an event this coming friday that I will be attending. Now I asked my OWG if he would like to accompany me, but now my Industry Buff says he will be attending as well.
They both know I am dating other people but I don’t feel like paying them both attention to save face. Should I cancel with OWG on Friday(I have a date with him tonight anyways) and just let this Industry buff be my date? Or dammit, let them both bump into each other? Or go by my damn self?
Sugarbaby in Crisis,
Diamond
Dear Diamond:
You are technically still single, right?
If you can carry an evening with two gentleman who are interested, do it. You should do it with finesse, by going alone, and meet your date there. If you come in with someone, it makes you look tied down for the rest of the night. If you do that, then best to tell them both you are flying solo. Keep in mind, there could be more prospects at this party.
I’ve written for Baller Alert about this very issue. If there is a “monied” party with high prospects you may never meet again, the last thing you want to do is look taken or occupied. At the same time, you want to appear desirable to other prospects there. Make the $1500 ticket worth it! It’s not to come with someone you just started seeing to get in the way. You can go with him only if he paid. Then become a social butterfly leaving him to wander about while you meet other people. If you go alone, you’ll seem available because you came alone, and most importantly desirable because you will already know two gentlemen that are there, which will provide you lots of opp to smile, talk, fling your hair and catch someone’s eye. Men like women other men like–period. That’s why a woman with a man is more likely to attract man than a single gal. Try it walking down the street one day.
Anyway, if you are ready to play that game, the quickest way to do it is to increase your numbers. In the civilian world, it takes more time with the right guy. But in the money world, it just takes more energy. For example, if you have 3 prospects, it’s very likely (if you do it right) one will lock it down with you in a matter of weeks. Those men like to move quick, every deal is potential close. Never settle to be a lease, always be a buy.
From Alphanista w/Love,
MR
![Reblog this post [with Zemanta]](http://img.zemanta.com/reblog_e.png?x-id=2a02c5a7-9e17-4ead-bcad-4574ac58309f)
@Anthony u broke that down good!
“I am interested in them both for the lifestyle obviously.”
Well this sounds like a business decision and should be treated as such. The OWG will probably be willing to spend more time and energy trying to please you as it will please his ego. If he is having a mid-life crisis as guessed, he will take every opportunity to stroke his own ego buying you stuff. Only problem is he’ll need a lot of attention. The music dude sees women daily. If it’s sex he wants, he doesn’t have to chase you down for it. He’ll get it eventually.
If the music dude is genuinely interested, it won’t drive him off. If not, then he’ll just move on to something easier. At the same time, keep in mind your own goals here which does not seem to be love. Do you want some guy who’s genuinely interested? That takes work, time, patience, etc etc etc.
I say stick with the OWG if it’s the lifestyle you’re looking for. Even if you’re looking for more, it’d be a good opportunity to see how the music dude reacts.
MR said it right – Men like women that other men like. With that said – go solo. Be nice to them both – if they are real G’s they will meet each other and probably make the connection themselves, laugh about it and push on. The next day you’ll know which one is serious about you.
Plus, at this party you should be adding more prospects to your cipher.
Enjoy the ride.
“ain;’ no man paying for no women these days”
………….what?
I say be up front with both of them. When men know another man is interested we get more interested. We’ll never tell u.
OMG are you serious? You need to really get a grip. Ain’t no man paying for no women these days, everything is free.
If you paid for a ticket for yourself then definitely go without a date. if they both want to attend let them, and introduce them Let them see you in your element. You can pay attention to both of them without making them the focus of the evening. One of them maybe even both will either step up and persue you even more, or step back and you will see how best to proceed. I am very open and honest with Men,I am single no need to lie there could be just you at the moment or 5 others. The choice is yours. It doesnt mean im intimate with all of them it means that each of them attracts a different part of me and Im sorry i just dont feel you can get everything you need and want from one person.. GO FOR IT!