I just found out that my husband of 5 years has been cheating on me.
He is well to do, financially set and he has been taking care of me and my child from another man for the last 8 years. Everything is in his name. I have put all my eggs in one basket and AM currently pregnant with our first child. This man has blatantly disrespected me. He doesn’t even care anymore coming home smelling like Bath & Body Works perfume and cheap lipstick on his collar. I talk to my strong, single girlfriends and they are like, leave him, because I will be set with support and the live good on his alimony. I do not work, so I know I will get something.
But what I didn’t say is that I love him. Should I stay?
Morning Sickness Forever, Ci
Why are you going to your girlfriends for advice?
Especially the Single Girl Brigade! They are the worst. You need the counsel of a happily married woman/couple, or better yet, a mediator like a marital counselor. It can be hard to get men to go to counselors but since you got him to marry you everything else should be easier than that. Ask him. To definitely decide to leave or stay you need some kind of action on your part. You are way too passive about all this. You are married and pregnant. You have only been married for 5 years. Have you asked your husband what he needs or is trying to communicate to you by cheating? Does he want the marriage to end? You know the truth. Sure, you may get some alimony, but then, what? You’ll be a single mother. Is the advice from your girlfriends worth all of that?
You didn’t mentioned HOW you found out your husband is cheating? Okay so you see perfume and lipstick stains, are they really lipstick stains? It could be your pregnancy hormones talking, and pregnant women are known to have a peculiar sense of smell. Stop guessing and be sure before you make any moves. Most marriages that have a cheating spouse don’t end because of the cheating, they end because of lack of communication.
Stop acting like a sitting duck. You sound so victimized and are attracting more victimizing experiences. Go get your husband. Work on your marriage via counseling and see if there is a chance. Your baby and future stability is worth it. But what do I know….
With love from Alphanista,