This is not a relationship question!
My relationship is really going great! I am 35, just got engaged, working at a really good job in legal, and my man is doing well, too. We are good! However, I’ve always had wanted to become a singer, a true talent for my generation.
I write songs, I perform in local shows, and even some clubs. I also want to do some acting, mostly commercials. Shame I got this idea a little too late, most people start in their teens! But I’d love to go on tour with Beyonce one day, or be in one of those car commercials. I hope I don’t sound silly, I just am so bored with my job, when my creative side is bursting to get out and live! I also love my man. We have an upcoming wedding, and I want kids–ASAP. How do I handle all of this happening all at once. My career aspirations, and my need to be a wife and mother? How do I choose!
Beyonce Part II,
Dana, Queens, NY
I’m NOT going to give you the cookie cutter answer–follow your dreams.
Obviously, you don’t even really know what dreams you want. Let’s look at the facts. Your baby making clock is ticking now. FACT! Doesn’t matter how much you hate it. Science still hasn’t come up with a way to safely extend our baby making years into forever land. With that being said, if you are really ready to be with your man, get that in order. Build your foundation. I see too many women who regret missing out on that. When they finally make a decision, it’s too late for ANYTHING. They are 10 years older, less desirable and less confident. So, Dana, I think you need to focus. Do not listen to folks telling you that a baby and marriage will hold you back. You are NOT a single mother who would more likely have to sacrifice. You’ll have your husband who should be on this journey with you.
Once you have your foundation, keep your singing going, but commercials may be more realistic and economical. It only takes a day or two to shoot, then you are done, with a nice check at the end. In the meantime, submit your stuff to www.nycastings.com and apply for auditions while at work. Maybe it’s not singing or acting, you just may need a new job, a breath of new energy. You can start your own singing coaching business from home, where you can help others and become influential in the industry. But I caution you about being so flaky about all this. Do you want to sing? Or act? Choose a route and explore that. Make your man apart of it all. So, he can feel just as invested and not cut off. Build your future TOGETHER. With a foundation, everything falls into place.
From Alphanista with love,