Happy 4th! Enjoy this classic!
There used to be a time where there was just a bunch of single women over 35. Now, it seems like more and more men are single over 35. At first look it may not be such a bad thing, but at a closer look, it’s just bad.
I was talking to a distinguished gentlemen at a “obama” party recently who is 35 and married with 2 children and a successful lawyer with his own practice, and a very nice writer wife, who said, “a good man marries at 35, the rest you don’t want”.
It could just be a married man hating, but it rings true at times. Most men say they are “waiting” for the right woman to come along, while they grow grey hairs, their belly gets larger, and their bad habits get more ingrained. I didn’t know men were supposed to “wait” for anyone. At 30, testosterone drops so the passivity may have something to do with it.
Obama married before 30, and they waited until their 30s to have kids. They had a plan. And you see, kids and family didn’t stop this man from the most ambitious career path on the planet. So that knocks out the excuse that kids and family would slow a man down. If anything marrying before 35 gave him perspective, focus, and passion. He had kids and a wife. How much more drive does one need?
Not surprisingly, alpha males usually have no problem with this because they need to control their environment, a very “alpha” reason.
Imagine if Obama was single at 35 with 3000 female Facebook friends living the life on the go, do you know that man, with those stories floating around out there with women, would not have a chance. Let’s not mention the scorned girlfriend who’d post his texts on her Facebook page for a few stacks from the Enquirer.
Now, I’m also understanding why older women marry younger men. There’s more focus, passion, and more testosterone. If you’re an older gal, you can also get pregnant quicker by a younger man. Has to do with sperm quality. Look it up.
But compromise. As we get older, it’s something, particularly men say they don’t want to do when they get married. Sounds borderline sociopath to me because compromise is one of the ways folks get along in this world. These types are usually never alone, but always lonely. And the “i’m picky” type, really means I don’t trust myself.
So, if you see a single man over 35, definitely entertain–especially if he’s been married before or has a reasonable excuse for being unmarried at 40 plus. But stay focused and listen to your gut. He should be talking about marriage in general early in the dating phase, asking questions about yourself, future, and being two things–consistent and persistent. The good thing about a man over 35 who is healthy, well rounded, and loves the idea of family and being with a woman, is that they’ll marry you quick….